Home Again (Tag Roe)

[Robert Williams]

‘’ I think men can judge on that matter. I have seen God be very harsh to many good people, so sometimes I think he can’t tell the difference between sinner and saint. Or maybe he likes people failing, where they have a lot to lose. I don’t know that. However, I do know that I can judge my own character well. I would say that I was a bad person, now, who has good moments. I am far more likely to wrong someone, than to get them to like me. It’s not that I am nasty, but I just make a lot of mistakes. But I am willing to change, which must count for something, right?’’

Roe had known Tom, at least close-up now, for just a short time. He was like several men he had run across. Gamblers were basically a special kind of con artist; its just they were bluffing or fooling their opponents for limited amounts of time. These men were often under the misconception that they could fool people away from the tables as easily. Frequently they were the easiest people to read, sometimes to be even fooled by others themselves. Roe thought that one of the many reasons that Tom had come home was that he was re-evaluating where his life was taking him, along with real possibility of course that he had pissed somebody off and had gone into hiding in some pace familiar. Oh well, Roe thought, he has a good heart down there somewhere at least, and he makes for an interesting companion.

“I once heard a man of God say that one of the reasons was that God is testing us, like a blacksmith with forge, and temperature-strengthen iron and steel. Some may not survive the process, but those who do will often be stronger. It doesn’t seem fair, but it’s always the good ones who get tested the most, but I guess life wasn’t supposed to be fair. Look at me. I was born to be a noble son, then that was taken from me and I was raised in another noble’s house, knowing that I would never enjoy those privileges. It is true that I was bitter for a time …. I don’t think I spoke to a person in the household for a year, and then the child Robin came along, and all changed, with the household and with me.”

‘’ I thank you for the compliment. However, I would have thought you would have had a poor opinion of me by now’’.

Roe laughed openly. “Tom, I have known many men like you in my life. You are a gambler …. you are used to pulling the wool over people’s eyes …. Sometimes by being cordial …. And sometimes not. Whether you are rude and condescending at times matters not …. You pretty much read like an open book. You have returned home seeking something that you have lost or are running from people or troubles, or a mixture of both. Those things don’t matter to me. In the here and now, you are being straight with me, and that’s what matters now … not your previous life. I’m not here to judge …. I’ve seen when others have judged to much and too quickly.”

‘’ Well I can always make them more comfortable by leaning back. You should try putting some fabric on them maybe’. I'll be happy to test things for you though'’.

“I will be grateful for any assistance that you can give.”

‘’ Have you got any tattoos or scars?’’

Roe shrugged and sighed, “Well there’s a different type of question that one doesn’t get often,” and Roe stood up and removed his cloak, and then his thread-bare shirt. “As you can see, I have no tattoos, but I do have battle scars from swordplay on my upper left-arm that I used my arm to block some parries when I had lost my shield, and I have these on my back as well.” He turned so Tom could see the multiple diagonal scars across is back that intersected with on another. “Care to guess how I got those, Tom?”

[Thomas Scarlett]

Tom hated the clergy in a way, for he had seen how corrupt a lot of them were. In fact, they were more sinful in a lot of ways than him. He wondered how anyone could buy their salvation, when they always preached on how you had to earn it. He knew that he was probably going to hell, but he had comfort in the knowledge that he probably wouldn’t be alone. ‘’ No offence Roe, but the clergy is usually speaking some nonsense or another. I think people are judged and tested all the time, but God pushes it to the limit then. He is rather spiteful in a way and I feel guilty for saying it being as he has always made sure I have benefited. I mean, so many good people have had hardships and no rewards, but I have just got richer and have had a good life through what many would call ill deeds. I know I should be extremely grateful, but it just seems wrong sometimes’’.

Tom smiled at Roe’s assessment of him. It was quite nice to hear that someone wasn’t concerned about his past when usually people found it something to be frowned upon. The bit about him being easy to read was worrying though. He wasn’t a very good gambler if that was the case, but he supposed he must have been if he had got money from it. ‘’ Thank you then Roe. I find you very hard to read though. I’m not sure what you are thinking, but I do think you are being straight with me. You would probably be very good at gambling actually. Have you practised it or something?’’

‘’ I won’t ask for anything in return either being as you are being so good as to let me stay here’’ Tom added, calmly.

‘’ I have been told I ask strange things sometimes’’ Tom said, smiling. The sight of Roe’s battle wounds was rather unexpected though. For some reason, Tom thought of Roe as being an extremely good soldier who never got injured. Perhaps that was a naive way to look at war though, to think that if you were a good fighter, you would never get injured when it was more of a case that a good fighter gets to keep their life. ‘’They look very painful. I’m glad I haven’t got any scars like that.’’ The wounds on his back looked a bit like a whip to Tom so that would be his guess. ‘’ Is it a whip? I’m not completely sure however being as I have never seen war’’.

[Robert Williams]

‘’ No offence Roe, but the clergy is usually speaking some nonsense or another. I think people are judged and tested all the time, but God pushes it to the limit then. He is rather spiteful in a way and I feel guilty for saying it being as he has always made sure I have benefited. I mean, so many good people have had hardships and no rewards, but I have just got richer and have had a good life through what many would call ill deeds. I know I should be extremely grateful, but it just seems wrong sometimes’’.

There were some things that Tom took a practical view of what happened to people in the real world and the fairness and unfairness of events. “I have never tried to set out blame for the events that happen to good people and bad. In the Crusades I saw all kinds of people, good and bad, who did things in God’s name. We often thought that God wondered, with all the people fighting who believed that god was on their side, if God wondered who was on his.”

‘’ Thank you then Roe. I find you very hard to read though. I’m not sure what you are thinking, but I do think you are being straight with me. You would probably be very good at gambling actually. Have you practised it or something?’’

It was quite plain, that as a gambler, Tom was always trying to accurately read the people around him. “I find it hard to believe that find me difficult to read. After all I am just a simple carpenter and woodsman,” he said with a slightly mischievous smile. “Let’s see I was a former nobleman’s son with no protector who was forced to grow up in another’s house, and then went off to Europe to fight, and had to figure out ways to survive. Every day was a gamble with real life …. I could not afford to be read so easily.”

‘’ I won’t ask for anything in return either being as you are being so good as to let me stay here’’ Tom added, calmly.

“That is quite thoughtful of you Tom, I must be a bad influence on you,” he laughed.

‘’ I have been told I ask strange things sometimes.’’… ‘’They look very painful. I’m glad I haven’t got any scars like that.’’ … ‘’ Is it a whip? I’m not completely sure however being as I have never seen war’’.

“Your deductive skills are quite sharp Tom. However, none ofthose scars was acquired on the Crusades. I was about 16 I think. When I was still with the Earl and apprenticing with your brother yet, I had become quite a marksman with the bow, and I had a whole set of bows. One morning I realized that one of them was missing, and I reported it to the old Earl. He announced that a bow had nicked by someone, and whoever was found possessing it would receive 20 lashes with the whip. Later that morning I found a very young man, the old Earl’s grandson, who was quite down in the mouth. Without much effort on my part he admitted taking it and handed it over to me. Since he was interested in it, I told him that I would show him how to use it, as long as knew to respect the property of others from then on.”

“I decided that I would go to the Earl and tell him that I had made a mistake and that I had simply misplaced it. He grimly indicated to me that since it was misplaced due to my own negligence that I would receive the 20 lashes. I could have turned him in I suppose, if I would have even been believed, but the lad would have taken the lashes. So, I sucked it up and took the punishment. I told Thornton what had happened, and he asked me if it was worth, and I bravely and foolishly said that I would have taken a 100. It took some weeks to fully recover. However, I think that the Earl knew what I had done, since he gave instructions to your brother that when I got back to work I was only to have light duties for awhile. You see, he felt once an infraction had been announced there had to be punishment, and I made myself conveniently available. One thing for sure, as far as punishment goes, I was always careful in meting out punishment like lashes. I was very aware of the pain it could cause. I think I’d rather go into battle than over go through a beating like that again. Well, what do you think of that?”

[Thomas Scarlett]

Tom was relieved that he didn’t take what he had just said too seriously, for there were many religious people about who would have took great offence at that comment. He did think there was an afterlife, and that hell and heaven were real places, but he also thought that people were going about religion in the wrong way. However, he had no idea what the right way was either. He did think that someone should be blamed for bad events though. It was a common human thing sometimes, to want something to be justified. ‘’ Well, I think someone does deserve some kind of blame. Everything happens for a reason, so someone must be doing something wrong. I reckon it’s because there is a lot of sin around, not that I am blameless of that of course.’’

Tom smiled back at him and said ‘’perhaps there is more than meets the eye then. You aren’t simple anyway. You’re of a higher rank than most people here, despite you not having the money anymore. I’m just a common gambler’’. He then listened to Roe’s explanation. He guessed that he did have to be careful, whereas Tom had no real responsibilities when he was a child, and young man. ‘’You can tell that you are better for your experiences though’’.

Tom was strangely insulted by Roe’s words. Sometimes people actually saying to him that he was a selfish git were like a slap in the face. It was much better just doing it and then leaving behind, without anyone knowing of his worse traits. ‘’ Well, I suppose so’’ he said, embarrassed.

The story of what happened to Roe was both gripping and a bit sad as well. He couldn’t imagine being actually cruelly treated when he was a young man. He was always patronised and shouted at, but Dan would never have laid a finger on him. It wasn’t that he couldn’t either. Tom was hardly weak, but Dan was exceedingly strong after working hard all day. It probably did occur to him to smack him at times, but he was respectable enough not to do so. This story made Tom feel a bit guilty, being as he always insulted his brother, whereas he could have done a lot worse. Shyly, still thinking about his own past, Tom replied ‘’It certainly puts my past in a lot of perspective for me. I am sorry that you were treated like that, and it was completely unjust, even to the one who did actually take the bow. No one deserves to be whipped for that. I am grateful you are sharing these stories with me though’’.

[Robert Williams]

‘’ Well, I think someone does deserve some kind of blame. Everything happens for a reason, so someone must be doing something wrong. I reckon it’s because there is a lot of sin around, not that I am blameless of that of course.’’

[b[Roe nodded his head quite solemnly. “Yes there are always those who at fault, just as there are always victims. However, often we are too quick to assign guilt or innocence, and in a rush to judgment, we sometimes make errors and mistakes that we regret later. Of course, some of us deserve more blame than others too.[/b]

‘’perhaps there is more than meets the eye then. You aren’t simple anyway. You’re of a higher rank than most people here, despite you not having the money anymore. I’m just a common gambler’’.

Its almost always the case that there is more than meets the eye with everything and everyone that we run across. A lot of the time its because the people we run into are very adept a hiding their true nature. That was a vastly different person. As far as I’m concerned that nobleperson no longer exists. I am just a carpenter now. In many ways, these days, most of us are gamblers, every time we get up and face a new day,”he laughed.

‘’You can tell that you are better for your experiences though’’.

"I wish now that I had not gotten to experience so many experiences, he chuckled. “Surely there are other and better ways to get knowledge and wisdom than to get it that way!"

‘’It certainly puts my past in a lot of perspective for me. I am sorry that you were treated like that, and it was completely unjust, even to the one who did actually take the bow. No one deserves to be whipped for that. I am grateful you are sharing these stories with me though’’.

Roe shrugged, “He was definitely from a different school of thought. In balance, he was good man, who treated those in his charge well. But he would not suffer fools or those who he felt violated the order and rules of the manor. We all knew what the rules were, and there would be no exception. Besides, it was my choice, and I made it, and I was satisfied to do it. I was afraid what the punishment would mean for the lad. And I have a feeling that that experience ….. of choices and severe punishment …. still have a guide on Robin today …. At least I hope the scars still serve a purpose,” he winked. "I'm more than happy to share them with you ... I'm just afraid many aren't very pleasant."

[Thomas Scarlett]

Tom nodded his head in agreement. He had never seen anyone falsely blamed that he actually knew, but he had heard about it from other people. Besides, crimes were sometimes made to sound worse than they were. The same could be said for what happened to Luke and Will. He was pleased that they did not get punished, for that definitely would be unfair. ‘’How much blame do you think you deserve then Roe?’’ he asked, interested. The last sentence sounded as if he thought he did deserve some blame. ‘’I don’t mean things that you have done which are big and major, but just the small everyday events that happens. Would you say that you are a bad on a daily basis, or good?’’

Tom smiled at him, still struggling to read what he really thought. He guessed that it must have become a habit from his gambling like Roe said. He did trust him, so he wasn’t expecting to be murdered in the night, but he did feel like he was holding something back. It probably wasn’t a secret, but just more about his character. Actually, thinking about it, Tom found it strange that he had not lost his temper yet. He was being an arrogant, smug idiot at the moment and most people would have given him a smack in the face now. Roe seemed to quite like him however, so he wondered what actually would irritate him. ‘’I see your point entirely. However, I think that you could be a perfect example of a person who hides what they are thinking well. I noticed how you haven’t lost your temper yet. What does actually annoy you?’’

‘’You could always just leave for a bit, go look around the country. It’s great. You just settle for a bit, not having to work, and then leave. It’s good for a while anyway’’ Tom said, rather bitterly. He did often wonder why he hadn’t settled in a few places, but there was no point in considering them now.

Tom smiled, while he considered what he had said. ‘’You know, perhaps you should have let Robin take the blame. I hear that he is quite a smug and arrogant person, despite being helpful to the needy. He is obviously good, but perhaps someone should have taught him to be more respectful and less in love with himself. Of course, I can’t really blame him for that being as I am hardly perfect.’’ Perhaps what he had just said was a bit harsh, but it was true. ‘’I would like to hear some more, if you would like to tell me another’’.

[Robert Williams]

‘’How much blame do you think you deserve then Roe? I don’t mean things that you have done which are big and major, but just the small everyday events that happens. Would you say that you are a bad on a daily basis, or good?’’

Roe stopped for a minute to think. He really hadn’t considered blame in the particular matter for some time. “In this particular matter, not a lot of direct blame. I shouldn’t have left all of those bows out like that …. In a way it was negligent I suppose. However, I was lucky in that the lad took only the one he had any hope of using. Most of the others were actually considerably more valuable. Was my blame commensurate to the punishment …. Hardly ….. but I can think of a very short list of crimes that are worthy of so severe a punishment.”

"In general, its hard to say. As far as I was concerned, when I left for Iberia and the Crusades, the person who I had been, who was a good and respectful per4son, had died. I did not consider what I did to be good or bad, before or after I did them, I just did them. I had no conscience. If I was told to go burn that village and leave no one living that’s what I did. It was not until I was in the Holy Land, and I ran across a well-experienced Knight, more experienced than I was. He asked me how I found Jerusalem and I told him that God does not speak to me …. that I had lost my religion. He told me that he had not heard that and that religion is used mainly by fanatics who try to justify their murders or plans of future murders. He told me that whether I am or do good on a particular day first depends on what is in my mind and then in my heart, and from that will decide whether I will be good or not. So …. today ….. I think I am good on a daily basis …. but mainly because each day, each hour, and each minute, I focus on trying to do right by people. Hopefully, it will become a result of habit. And yourself?”

‘’I see your point entirely. However, I think that you could be a perfect example of a person who hides what they are thinking well. I noticed how you haven’t lost your temper yet. What does actually annoy you?’’

Roe let out a sudden boisterous chuckle. “Many things can cause that. First of all, people who ask me what annoys me annoy me,” he smiled. “We knew what you were like years ago, so none of your behavior has been a surprise to me, plus, many of the men I fought with, were a lot like you. Besides, I trained myself in battle to ignore the personal insults that opponents would try and get under your skin. So that doesn’t bother me. What does bother me is when people use their positions of power or authority to oppress other people. That doesn’t me it has to be a Prince or a Sheriff, but it could be an outlaw or even a gambler, under the right circumstances. With me the sign is that when I turn absolutely silent, that means the rage is building, so just stay out of the way.”

‘’You could always just leave for a bit, go look around the country. It’s great. You just settle for a bit, not having to work, and then leave. It’s good for a while anyway’’ Tom said, rather bitterly.

“That is true, it can be good for the spirit to explore new places, even in your home country. However, it seems, eventually your always drawn or attracted back home.”

‘’You know, perhaps you should have let Robin take the blame. I hear that he is quite a smug and arrogant person, despite being helpful to the needy. He is obviously good, but perhaps someone should have taught him to be more respectful and less in love with himself. Of course, I can’t really blame him for that being as I am hardly perfect.’’

Roe shook his head in the negative. “No, I don’t think, at that time anyway, that that was something that I could have done. I looked on him, though not as a brother, as someone that I should protect. Although the punishment may not have been as severe as threatened, given who he was, I decided I would not take that risk. It was not really his fault ….. it wasn’t malicious in a pre-meditated sort of way. And I think it taught him a lesson in responsibility and punishment. Anyway, whether he was smug or arrogant didn’t fit into the equation for me, although I have heard similar things about him. I have not seen him in so many years, though, I would hate to judge anyone, even one such as he. Such attitudes, and far worse, though, are found throughout the noble class. Just think how bad I would have been if I would have stayed a baron’s son,” he gently poked Tom in the ribs with a smile and a laugh.

‘’I would like to hear some more, if you would like to tell me another’’.

“Hmmm …. Well probably the worst one that I was in in the Crusades was the siege of Jerusalem. We were heavily outnumbered by Saladin’s forces …. probably 20 to 1 at the least. Its in situations like that that you see the true character of men. Ordinary men who were elevated to knights, since many of the knights had either left, rather than face the task of defending the city, or had been massacred in the battle in the desert. You see, one of the reasons that my skills were in demand, was not just my fighting skills, even though I was an accomplished archer. With my training as a carpenter I had some abilities as a military engineer, and skills in the building and combating of siege towers, as well as the construction of catapults and trebuchet. I led a cadre of men, fighting alongside Balian at the Christopher’s gate, where the Muslims attempted their final penetration of the walls of Jerusalem”.

“You see, even though the Muslims held a vast numerical advantage, they could only fit so many men through the gap at a time, and that’s where we meet them in hand-to-hand combat. There was unbelievable carnage. I have absolutely no idea how many I killed ….. it was like living in another world …. It was a blur. But we held the ground, and the Muslims indicated they wanted to discuss terms. I went down to the tent in the midst of the battlefield that they had set up, and we negotiated with Saladin himself. In our walk from the city’s walls to the tent I don’t think our feet touched the soil once, there were so many bodies and blood littered about. At any rate, Balian negotiated the surrender of the city and all of us were permitted to leave unharmed. Saladin was fair man and leader, much fairer than many of the lords of the Crusaders that I had run across.”

“King Richard was on his way to the Crusades by that time, but this carpenter had had enough. So the moral of this story …. if there is one …. is that I had learned innumerable ways to kill, but I had learned too much and too well. If I was going to save my soul and my sanity I would have to choose a path of building, and not one where I was directly responsible for 100s of deaths and indirectly responsible for thousands through the building of machines of war. So …. You may sense that I hide things of my past and myself …. most of them deal with that period, although some deal with why I left Britain in the first place …. that if you get me drunk enough, I’ll tell you that story,” he laughed.

[Thomas Scarlett]

‘’The boy was completely to blame in that incident. He should have done two things. The first is that he shouldn’t have taken the bow in the first place being as it wasn’t his. I am a lot of things, but I would not steal anything. It’s one of the only things that annoy me greatly. Well, that and cheating. Although, the two are very similar. In a way, cheating in gambling is the same as stealing the money from people you are playing with’’. Tom scowled at what he had just said. To him it was his job, and play just made him seem far less serious than it really was. ‘’Back to the point though, the second thing is he should have took the blame. He was a coward being as he didn’t, and a selfish one at that. In a way, that is what I would have done, but at least I can see my own faults. I doubt Robin regrets it. I bet he is just glad of an unscarred back and has no remembrance of you.’’ Tom took another swig of the beer that was beside him. After talking for so long, he had lost track of just how many he had drunk. It was probably a safe assessment that it was a lot though, hence why he was being so unforgiving in his words. ‘’However, it is arguable the blame should go to the parent. I find that a lot of people who are considered blameful had poor parenting.’’

He then smiled at Roe’s philosophy and commented ‘’It is so simple to think that. However, perhaps you can cause people more pain by trying to do right by them. For instance, if you have wronged a woman. You can try so hard to try and make it up to her, but by just doing that it causes more pain to her. Another example is that even if you want to do well, it can be too hard to let go of trying to do right by yourself. Although, perhaps I am too weak willed than most people.’’ The question quickly wiped the smile from his face, and his expression became more of that of guilt. ‘’I am bad pretty much on a daily basis, according to some people. I drink at least one glass of beer every day, and will gamble at least every week as well. All in all, I’m not an evil person, and do not intentionally hurt others like say the sheriff, but I am selfish as well for the majority of the time.’’

Tom looked shocked at Roe not finding him irritating in any way. The amount of people who had said it was too many to count now. He remembered that most women he met, say that he is good looking and one of the more generous men they knew, for he always started off buying them drinks and jewellery, but his arrogance was incredibly irritating. He didn’t mind that assessment though, as long as the good looking bit was still there. The rest of what Roe said didn’t come as much of a shock though, rather it sounded like what a soldier probably would say. ‘’So, there are no things that can get you riled up easily? It’s just I wanted to know how hard your punch was’’ he asked, a bit embarrassed. After all these stories, he wanted to know just how strong Roe truly was, even if he did end up with a black eye afterwards.

Tom nodded in agreement, even though the desire to come home had been rather weak until now. Still, even though he missed out on seeing his nephews grow up, he was glad to have had the travelling experiences that he had had. ‘’So, where is the best place you have been to? I bet you could beat a lot of mine’’.

‘’I imagine that you would have been quite bad. If I were to turn up on your doorstep and you had had been brought up as a noble, I suspect you would be very different indeed. I should think that you would be giving me a place on the floor to sleep, and just generally looking down your nose at me. I mean, there are a variety of things you could have picked up on about me. The fact that I, to be fair, am unemployed, lazy, my clothes aren’t too clean and yet I still have a high opinion on myself would probably just be at the top of your list of insults. However, I do think that you would be somewhat better than Robin. You did him a great service, and I admire you for that, but I think he is one of the worse nobles out there for being smug.’’ He smacked Roe lightly on the arm after being poked. ‘’Commoners are a bit too rough for pokes’’.

Tom listened carefully to Roe’s story, without losing his concentration once. He found History interesting, one of the few things apart from himself that he did actually want to listen to, but it was always more interesting actually listening to a proper person’s history. The story itself was exceedingly gory and the amount of dead bodies was difficult to comprehend. This was true especially for Tom. He wanted to share a story with someone, but he had never done so. He had told many stories in the past, but never that one. However, he trusted Roe, so maybe he would ask for him to hear it later. Still, it was no better than this story and he imagined that it would have had a smaller effect than this one had on Roe. He couldn’t imagine how he felt about it now, but he guessed that there must have been a fair amount of guilt and regret. All the same, he did feel very honoured to have learnt of it; for he was sure that Roe didn’t just tell it to anyone he met. ‘’Thank you a great deal for telling me that story as I would imagine it wouldn’t be something you particularly enjoy thinking about. It wasn’t too hard for you to think of it again was it? I should like to hear more stories, like the ones you mentioned, if you have the time. Either that or I just wait till you get drunk. There still seems to be a lot of beer, so that could very well happen.’’ Tom smiled at him, trying to be encouraging and friendly, although he wasn’t sure if it would come across like that. ‘’Could I ask you a favour? Would it be possible for you to hear a story of mine? I have wanted to tell someone for a long time, but there was never a right opportunity. However, I would like to say it as perhaps that would help a little bit’’.

[Robert Williams]

Roe leaned back in his chair to consider what Tom was trying to relate to him. It seemed to him that Tom was looking at it as something that was pretty black and white, while Will saw a lot of grays there. ”I’m sure if you just look at the facts, yes, I could see that point of view. However, the way that I look at it is that Robin was just a lad, and a curious one at thaat, about a tool that one day he might be the best England from what I hear. So, he might have had a natural attraction to it …. even then. Yes ….. he could have admitted to it ….. but I told him not to … and in exchange I would give him some lessons …. But he would always owe me for the favor. Besides …. Its not the act or the punishment itself that’s important, its what you learn from the experience. He ;earned its much easier on the soul to take responsibility for one’s own actions, rather than depending on others to protect you. From what I hear, arrogant though he may be, that’s something he has taken to heart.”

”Well, then, I will make sure that I never steal anything from you, I would hate to have to annoy you. However, I really don’t look at a lad as young as he was, and of his positions as being a coward. That’s very true, he may not reget what he did, even if he remembers it. I just hope he remembers a lesson, even if he has no memory of me. Oh yes …. The parents …. And the grandparents …. Well they believed in the old ways just because they were the old ways,” he shrugged, thinking about the shame that that was. He had hoped, that being a defender of the poor, that Robin had turned out well, someone who was used to a little self-sacrifice, but you never knew about most people until you actually saw them weather a crisis.

Yes, he had a lot of personal experiences trying to do right by people, and just as many eperiences, if not more, of failing. “I think its, just as important, making the attempt, at least, rather than by not trying at all. I think when it is a significant enough issue to you, personally, that you are strong-willed enough. Ah …. The question is, though, not whether other people think you are bad, but whether you do. That’s a more difficult accusation to escape. Also, when you choose the more solitary life you are just bound to feel more selfish than the average bloke. As far as I’ve ever seen, an ale a day isn’t enough to qualify someone as bad”

‘’So, there are no things that can get you riled up easily? It’s just I wanted to know how hard your punch was.’’

”Really,” Roe asked with a mischievous smile on his face, as he set down his glass, hooking the back leg of Tom’s stool with his left foot, driving off his right foot, and landing a right hook on the point of Tom’s chin, as pulled his stool out from underneath him, and Tom went sprawling in a heap. ”I do hope your fine Tom and your head didn’t bounce too far off the floor …. but you did ask for it ….and that wasn’t my hardest punch. Here … take a hand … and he pulled him back up. By the looks of you I didn’t damage your severely, but the back of your head, your neck, and your chin are likely to be sore for some time,” he grinned.

“So ….. let’s here that story now, shall we.” as he sat Tom back up on a stable stool, not knowing if Tom still trusted him as much as he did before.

[Thomas Scarlett]

Tom smiled at him, finding his attitude quite pleasing to listen to. It was strange for usually he didn’t find nice people who took pity on others as good company, but Roe did it rather well. There was sincerity to his words. ‘’Well, I suppose I can’t argue against that. I guess he was just a curious boy at the time, who really didn’t know what he was doing. How old was he at the time anyway?’’

‘’I should hope that you don’t steal from me’’ Tom said grinning. ‘’I would probably have to cut off your hand or something. Maybe your head.’’ He liked having a joke sometimes, even if they were based on things he had considered in the past. It was probably best not to reveal that to the person he was living with however. ‘’My father was a bit like that as well I suppose. He was exceedingly strict, although physical punishments weren’t really his thing. Dan had a beating once I think for stealing. It happened when I was about 8 so I can’t remember that much. But I think he stole something of great value and my father had to pay for it, which of course he wasn’t too pleased about’’ Hence, Dan was beaten, but not badly. The beating is probably where he got his ugliness from actually now that I think about it’’.

‘’The attempt is made for wrong reasons at times though. I personally don’t think it is right to do good things to try and ease a conscience. I would much rather carry on the way I am for myself, then try to be falsely good’’ he said solemnly. It was one of the more serious things he had said that night, so he hoped Roe didn’t find it a bit too serious. ‘’I would say I was a bit too selfish at times though. Wouldn’t you say I was?’’

Tom didn’t like how Roe walked over to him, or how he was tilting his stool. He was half joking when he said he wanted to hit him, but he guessed it was too late for that now. It had been a long while since he had a proper punch anyway, so perhaps he needed a smack in the face every once in a while. He would likely look a mess for a bit with a black eye, but he didn’t care too much at the moment. When Roe punched him it was one of the hardest ones he had, and he had had quite a few. The added element of being thrown to the floor was original as well. Tom rubbed his neck out of pain, and sat up. ‘’That was pretty impressive’’ he mumbled as Roe helped him back onto the stool. ‘’I’m sure that one of my punches would have been more impressive though’’.

Tom rubbed his leg a bit, for he was distracted by a dampness he felt there. Soon enough, his trousers were tainted a faint red in that particular area. It had seemed that he had somehow cut himself there, although he wasn’t sure what on. Turning back to Roe he said ‘’I’ll tell you that story in a bit as I seem to be bleeding. I don’t suppose you know first aid do you, from your military training?’’

[Robert Williams]

Roe appreciated the way that, sometimes at least, that Thomas would re-valuate what he had just said, and maybe even change his mind. He supposed that it came from Tom’s life as a gambler, in which would always be re-evaluating his situation and his environment. “Yes, that was always my reading on Robin at that time that he was always a curious and inquisitive young lad …… always pushing the envelope, as might be said. Ah yes, he would have been all of 7 years of age by time I was 16.”

Roe guessed that anyone stealing from Tom would have to best be prepared for the consequences. “I guess that would mean that if I chose to steal from you that I had better just kill ya, so I wouldn’t have to worry about the consequences, eh? You sound as if many of your punishments would come straight out of Mosaic law in the Old Testament,” he laughed. Roe listened to the Tom’s description of his father’s punishment. “Of course the effectiveness of physical punishment is as an example or deterrent to others. However, it has been my experiences that all it develops in the subject of the punishment is immense hatred, that hopefully dissipates with time. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case.”

After listening to Tom for awhile longer, Roe nodded his head. “Yes …. I think it is important to be true to yourself. If you’re not others will more often than not be able to see right through your falsity, no matter how good you may think that your acting job has been. Yes ….. I would not say that it would be too much of a reach saying that you not often afflicted with being overly humble,” he laughed.

‘’I’m sure that one of my punches would have been more impressive though’’.

”I’m sure that one of your punches would have been most impressive as well. However, you really did ask for this one you know. Also, you are kind of making the assumption that that was the hardest one that I could throw, and it was not. I didn’t want to hit you with one so hard that you would be bouncing your head off the floor, so, believe it or not, I held back a bit,” he said as he smiled broadly.”

‘’I’ll tell you that story in a bit as I seem to be bleeding. I don’t suppose you know first aid do you, from your military training?’’

Roe thought to himself that he must have landed on something sharp to have caused that. ”That’s probably one of the few things that I have experience with. I expect its only superficial. ‘d hate for anything to detract from your story.”

[Thomas Scarlett]

‘’Being as he was so young then, I guess he needed more of a verbal lesson than a physical one then. Obviously I’m not an expert on parenting, and would most likely make a bad one anyway, but I always found that little children don’t learn discipline that quickly. Beatings are worse on older children anyway though because they will just get bitter and in the severest of cases they can actually fight back. I would have loved for Dan to have done that to Will’’ Tom said to Roe, with a smirk. He knew that Will could have beaten Dan badly should he ever have wanted to, and it was a shame he never did. Tom wouldn’t have because he couldn’t see the point, and besides it would have been doubly bad for Dan if he was hit by his own son.

Tom laughed at Roe’s comment being as he could see it wasn’t an actual threat. It was an odd thing to say to a guest at your home, but he was glad that he was comfortable enough around him to say such things. ‘’I would probably kill you if I ever thought I would get the same treatment from you. Don’t worry, however, I would make sure it was done painlessly in your sleep’’. Tom was pretty glad that Roe shared his opinion on physical punishment as the fact that he it only caused hatred was something that he thought as well. ‘’I agree with you completely Roe’’.

‘’Humbleness is over rated anyway. You have been quite humble though, despite you actually having a lot to brag about. You are capable both physically and intellectually and you also have a very nice home. If I was you, I would be bragging nonstop right about now’’ Tom told him truthfully. It was a little aggravating actually that he was being modest when most people would be very proud of what they had achieved. Still, it was just part of his personality Tom supposed.

Tom glared at his sudden arrogance, although he suspected it was all part of his little joke, which was a tiny bit amusing. However, it was more annoying than anything else being as he said he held back. The punch was really starting to make his head go a bit sore now, and he knew it would be like this the next morning, if not worse. He didn’t want to admit that to Roe though as he didn’t really want to appear week to him. ‘’Fair enough. I would probably hold back as well on you’’ he replied bitterly whilst he looked at his leg again. ‘’I’ll leave it then to tell you my story. It probably won’t be of as much interest to you as it is to me so you may get bored’’.

‘’As you know, me and Dan didn’t get on exactly well after my father’s death. Well, there is a bit more to it than him just treating me like a son all of a sudden and being ridiculously strict. Don’t get me wrong, I do despise that as well, but just not quite as much as what he did first. That’s what really annoyed me. In fact, I would have thought that I would have forgiven him by now, and whilst he was still alive, if that was the only reason.

Anyway, it all started when my Father got ill. It was an ordinary day, and I still remember it. The day was one of those days when it seems like the world is in a bit of a lull. I was bored all day, so went to walk in the nearby lanes, as I did sometimes on such days. Meanwhile, Dan was with my father whilst he was working to try and observe what he was doing so that he would be a good carpenter. Most of my days were like this, but I preferred it that way. My father would always show me the most attention at home, so it seemed only fair that Dan should have his full attention at work.

After walking for about three hours I returned home in the evening. Usually, they would still be at work by this time so I went to go see where exactly they were. I wasn’t worried by this point as I just figured that they went home early because maybe they would have done enough work for the day. However, when I did arrive back home, Dan was in a really bad way. Apparently, my father had just gotten really ill of a sudden and then blacked out. Dan was there for it all, and he did try his best to wake him up, but eventually he had to take him home. He looked like he had been crying a lot, but that was no good to me. I was young at the time, and someone who relied on people as well. You can probably guess that I took it even worse. Perhaps I shouldn’t have been so needy, but there is no point looking back at it now.

Over the next few days, my father did wake up in regular intervals, but his condition, whatever it was, was worsening by the day. I wanted to see him so badly.... but Dan refused to let me go near him. He treated me like a child and said that I would just wear him out even more. I knew by then that it was probably the end for my Dad, so naturally I wanted to see him one last time. No matter what I said though, or how much I pleaded, my older brother didn’t give me that. I don’t think I can ever forgive him for that.

The annoying thing is that Dan said he treated my father well in his last days at the funeral. How well could he have treated him though? I’m not going to lie and said he loved us both equally, because everyone who knew us at the time knew he loved me the most. So how hard must it have been for him to have seen his favourite child one last time? I do wonder if Dan ever considered that, but I doubt it. He could be so cruel at times, but this is the worst of it.’’ Tom finished his story, and drank the last of his drink once he had.

[Robert Williams]

“Sometimes a physical lesson just causes them to fight against you and the pain. They don’t pay any attention to what it was that brought about the punishment. If they can see and experience the consequences of their actions on others, sometimes it can be more effective . Oh, I wouldn’t sell myself short if I were you Tom. You really never know what you are capable of until you are put into the situation you know. I really don’t know if Will would have fought back directly. Somehow he didn’t seem like he would have been the type. However, I know that he would have found some indirect way to get back at him. Sometimes I do wonder what kind of father I would have been if I would have stayed.”

Roe laughed at the thought of him being humble in many ways. He knew that, when allowed, he had been arrogant and not at all modest as a youngster. He had believed that he was better than many others. It was what had given him confidence as a young man, and that confidence had helped him to survive when times were tough, especially fighting as a crusader. “The fact is, Tom, I am quite arrogant in certain areas, I just haven’t exposed it to you in polite conversation. I learned that the things that I excelled at were often compounded by the people that I worked with ….. sort of my teammates. I learned much about carpentry and engineering from Dan, your brother. I learned much of history from the Earl and and other noblemen. And I learned much about fighting from other nobles in western and central Europe. So, maybe I don’t think that I have the right to brag.”

Roe saw the irritated look that he had gotten from Tom after he had hit the floor and he was sure that the punch had hurt more than Tom would ever let on. “Yes, I would expect that 2 friends would not go all out trying to kick the crap out of each other. I am sure that you could bring me to my knees quickly enough. However, if you want to put the question to the test, and have an all-out fight here, I am game if you desire it. And by the way, I doubt very much if I will find your story boring.”

Roe listened with great interest to Tom’s story about his youth, his brother, and his father. It did not sound like the Dan that he had known, exactly, but he could see him acting in that manner. “It sounds very much like someone who is trying to exert power and control over others. I am sure that he saw it as a way to get back at a younger brother who was much closer to their father, and this was his way of turning the tables on the favoritism that he thought was obvious. That’s not saying it was right, but that’s how he rationalized it I expect. It was a horrible way to treat you and your father, but there’s nothing that we can do about that now. All we can do is the best and fairest work that we know to do, don’t you think? And I think we need to treat that leg of yours and then go somewhere that we can replenish that ale of yours.”, he said as he arose.

[Thomas Scarlett]

‘’I see your meaning, but Will would be far smarter than that. He would respond to all sorts of punishment in the correct way I would have thought. He’s a very clever young man, and he was a clever boy as well. I am sure that if we would have been of noble blood, he would have made something very great of himself’’ Tom said proudly. ‘’I think you would have been a very good father Roe if you would have stayed. I’m not being false or anything, but so far you have come across as a thoroughly respectable and kind man who I am sure would bring up a child very well indeed. Perhaps you should try and have a child. It would be something worth considering for someone like you I think’’.

Tom listened to what he had had learnt, interested in a strange way. Normally, learning new things seemed like a bit of a waste of time to him for he never could remember it. However, the things that Roe seemed to know seemed very interesting and he would like to know about it in particular. ‘’So tell me what you know of history then Roe, I find that kind of thing pretty useful to know. I never did learn much of it, so I am sure you could tell me some quite useful information. Intelligence isn’t my strongest of points, so i would like you to be patient just in case I don’t understand anything’’ he said, meekly. It was pretty embarrassing to admit that you were stupid when you had just spent the whole evening bragging.

Tom considered the prospect of fighting with interested, but ultimately decided against it, for various reasons. The main one being that he assumed Roe would be far stronger than he was. He was used to fighting, and appeared to have larger muscles than he did. In fact, he was convinced that an all out fight would only result in him getting a black eye and a few knocked out teeth. ‘’I’m alright for a proper fight thank you Roe. I have no desire to hurt you, as I am sure I probably will. You are getting on a bit now after all’’ Tom teased him, hoping not to let on that he was actually wary about getting beat up by his new friend.

‘’I suppose you are right about that. I must admit, I am still sorry and feel a tiny bit of sympathy for Dan when I ever think about what happened. I know my father loved him, but just not as much as me. I will always be grateful to my father for that, but all the same, I do sometimes find myself wondering if things would be different if my father loved us both equally. Who knows though? Perhaps I would have been a good uncle and have a proper job by now. I wouldn’t change my life for anything however’’ Tom replied, hoping that would answer the question that was asked of him. He then watched as Roe got up off of his chair, anxious about what he might do. His leg was starting to throb now, and ways to make it feel better always seemed to be very painful. Sighing, he sat back on the floor and stretched out his legs. His bare feet, his boots somewhere under the table, touched the legs of the stool that he was sitting on. ‘’I hope that you won’t do anything that will hurt me too much’’ he said to Roe, a little concerned. ‘’Going out somewhere after this sounds nice as well, if my leg is alright’’.


(OOC: sorry about taking ages to reply again).

[Robert Williams]

‘’I see your meaning, but Will would be far smarter than that. He would respond to all sorts of punishment in the correct way I would have thought. He’s a very clever young man, and he was a clever boy as well. I am sure that if we would have been of noble blood, he would have made something very great of himself’’ Tom said proudly. ‘’I think you would have been a very good father Roe if you would have stayed. I’m not being false or anything, but so far you have come across as a thoroughly respectable and kind man who I am sure would bring up a child very well indeed. Perhaps you should try and have a child. It would be something worth considering for someone like you I think’’.

It was interesting to hear Tom talk about Will and evaluate what kind of person he had developed into. Of course, Roe had left very shortly after Luke had been born, and when Will had been a little boy. Roe had missed them growing up and watching them evolve. Roe knew nothing of what kind of man Will had grown into. As for himself, he had grave doubts of his abilities as a parent. “Well, as you have shown, I think that both of the boys comes from good stock. I have heard that Will is good with wood, and the building of things, in his own right. I expect that he will be capable of making something great of himself, even without noble blood. With respects to myself, I thank you for the compliment, but I’m not at all sure that I possess the proper skills to have been or be a good parent. If God wills it, perhaps it will happen. I am not holding my breath, though, waiting for such an opportunity.”

‘’So tell me what you know of history then Roe, I find that kind of thing pretty useful to know. I never did learn much of it, so I am sure you could tell me some quite useful information. Intelligence isn’t my strongest of points, so i would like you to be patient just in case I don’t understand anything.’’

Tom seemed to be actually concerned about acquiring some knowledge about their country’s past. “They say that whosoever fails to learn from the lessons of the past are condemned to repeats its mistakes, and I think that we’ve seen plenty of mistakes, just in recent years, to learn from,” he chuckled. “Different people have taught me different things. I think its important to gain knowledge from a variety of sources, since all people and groups have biases of one type r another. I relied on the Earl and his family to educate me on my original family, where hey came from and what they did. I also relied on them to teach me of our Roman and Saxon pasts, as well as the incursions of the Norse and the Normans, and what the effects of each of those were. When I went o Europe and the Holy Land I learned about Continental culture and history, as well as that of the Arabic and Islamic peoples. To overcome your opponent your opponent in battle often means that you must understand him and the way they think …. How they might react to certain situations … what they will risk all to defend. Its also important to know something of the history of the local area. Beiong an apprentice in your brother’s hose was often ….. educational about local attitudes and history … at least to the yeomen and the peasants. What aspect of history would you have the most interest in ….. gambling perhaps?,” he smiled.

‘’I’m alright for a proper fight thank you Roe. I have no desire to hurt you, as I am sure I probably will. You are getting on a bit now after all’’

Roe smiled, and thought to himself what a full-out fight with Tom would be like. He knew that he could not be trusted to fight by any ‘rules’, since he was sure what Tom would do whatever it would take to win. “I thank you for taking the decrepit and elderly condition of myself into account, Tom. I’m sure that you would be willing to do to win no matter what friendship we have developed, and your natural inclination not to do me too much bodily harm. Of course, me being an experienced Crusader, I would never fight any way but in a fair way, wouldn’t you expect?,” he said with a broad smile. “Normally, given your present painful condition, though, I would hate to take advantage of you, but if you insist, I am more than willing to give it a go,” he said clearing some chairs out of the way.

‘’I suppose you are right about that. I must admit, I am still sorry and feel a tiny bit of sympathy for Dan when I ever think about what happened. I know my father loved him, but just not as much as me. I will always be grateful to my father for that, but all the same, I do sometimes find myself wondering if things would be different if my father loved us both equally. Who knows though? Perhaps I would have been a good uncle and have a proper job by now. I wouldn’t change my life for anything however.’’

Roe had found that we always questioned and had regrets over the various acts and actions we had taken earlier in life. “Its just natural to feel that about things we have done or let happen earlier in our lives, Tom. That’s even the case when it comes to people we really didn’t care about very much. We often wonder if things would have worked out differently if we had acted differently. Besides you still have the chance and opportunity to be a good uncle now. Remember, since it’s the here and now that’s the most important, as opposed to the past that we cannot change. I wouldn’t change it either …. It would make you into a different person …. And we couldn’t have that, could we,” he smiled slightly.

‘’I hope that you won’t do anything that will hurt me too much.’’ ‘’Going out somewhere after this sounds nice as well, if my leg is alright’’.

“I’d say you just landed it on it wrong, and it will be better once we straighten it out. However, if you like me to take you on and lay you out good and proper, I’m game. We’ll probably enjoy that kind of game though, if we are a bit more drunk than we are now, and that may only be accomplished by a night in a tavern, perhaps with some cards to pass the time,” he laughed.