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Post by xarae on Feb 7, 2008 20:09:58 GMT
Despite all maps and borders,
And all wars and globes,
I've been led to uncharted lands.
Forget your compass and scars,
This world will tear you apart.
- - - - -
Parents are funny people. Though, I suppose, they do not see humor in everything. They simply would not understand why it was wrong for me to accept coin from the noble - Javier, I do believe. To hell with formality! I will call him what I like on sheets of parchment which no one will ever find.
My refusal has cost me little, as the only thing I seem to value these days is myself and my horse. Darling mum decided she'd teach me a lesson, force me out on my own.
Oh, well. At least she let me keep a few copper pieces and my horse. Vern is all I really need. Da did teach me well, I know my way around a dagger. Though that is really all I know... unless I meet some very stupid hares, I suppose I will go hungry. No matter, its what I'm used to. If I ever were truly full, I suppose it would feel quite odd.
So I am to leave Knighton, though where I will do I know not. Perhaps I'll take a leisure ride in the forest first. It has always interested me, since the time I was a child. Vern will enjoy the fresh air. Eh, maybe one of these days I'll even run into Hood and his men. Dear mother would die of shame. T'would serve her right, too.
Oh, Emily has found me. Hiding out in the barn once more, sister? What a petulant brat. I do hope she gets dragged off by a suitor soon enough, though since it seems I no longer belong in Knighton, this will not be a trouble for much longer.
At least where I'm going - wherever that may be - my secrets will remain exactly that. Secret.
Anyhow, it is time for me to tack up Vern and take my leave. Parchment will be few and far between from now on, I don't expect to write much. At least I have the great bay beast to keep me company.
text in purple © forgive durden |
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Post by xarae on Feb 10, 2008 4:24:52 GMT
Well I've had this secret,
And I feel it's time that you should know.
When I'm in your arms it turns me on,
But I've got a conscience too.
And it says my heart's never in tune
With anything I do.
- - - - -
Hmm. I do not typically indulge in such frivolities, but I must say - two gentlemen have certainly caught my eye. Namely (for of course this will stay private) Lord Mannering and his companion Javier. I do feel right calling Lord Mannering by his name, too formal for what I know of him. Javier, however, has fully assured me in being able to call him what I like.
Need I say this causes butterflies to dance in my stomach?
Both are exceedingly handsome in their own way, though Lord Man - oh, never mind these formalities. It truly annoys me that I feel wrong in calling him... what was it? Ah, yes. Sebastian. Sebastian, that is, is built taller by perhaps an inch or so.
Both are nobles, so once more, I must question why I am even writing. Me? A mere peasant? Hah! It is laughable to fantasize that I am worth more than perhaps warming their beds for a passing night. A girl must dream though. For if she doesn't dream, what meaning is there to life? I truly loathe the path my parents set before me, though I suppose I damned myself when I let slip to that Brooke boy of the taste of his name. Truly, I thought I was in the right. Who wouldn't like to know that their name tastes of apple pie?
Oh, I suppose we are entitled to our opinions. And our pride, and our arrogance, as I have already established with Javi.
Yes! Back to the more favorable subject of those two dashing nobles. I know Javier better, though it that isn't saying much. A conversation in the square and a quiet time within the walls of the Hall is all we share, though I did quite enjoy it when he held my hand. The trivial pleasures of life are truly wonderful. Who knew something as simple as a handclasp could evoke such a splendid feeling?
My previous suitors were all quite boring and unimaginative. All drab village boys, all of whom sought stolen kisses behind the barn, thinking themselves so very creative for it. So very adventurous. I'd like to see what Javier or Sebastian would get up to alone with a pretty girl in the dark. Much more than a village boy would ever chance, I'd bet.
Another thing that intrigues me about the pair is their power of insinuation. Whoever thought the word trend could sound so darkly delicious? Certainly not me. I must teach the poor man some proper grammar, though. His broken speech is endearing, though I suppose his noble "friends" do not think it so. Hmm... that does arouse questions though. You would figure a noble of any sort would learn his languages well before traveling abroad. Perhaps they do it differently in Spain.
Oh my, was that a euphemism?
I do fancy them both, though it is doubtful anything will come of it. I suppose the best I can do is watch and wait... and hope either one of them catches my eye once more. I swear, that is all I need. One stolen glance, and I will have my way! I will, I will, I will. Mother always told me I could be a stubborn, petulant brat when I didn't get what I believe was coming to me. Well, Javier and Sebastian are certainly not owed to my by any means, but it would be nice for a... hmm... companion?
text in purple © nightmare of you |
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