Post by imani on Jan 8, 2008 22:59:40 GMT
Assa'lâm â'laykum.
Sorry. I suppose I should write this in English, seeing as how I’m meant to be, what’s the word? ‘Improving’ my skills in the Gaudi tongue. They think I can’t speak it, but that’s their own look out for failing to truly comprehend the signs. Today wasn’t necessarily the best day I could’ve had, but it wasn’t terrible either. I was sent to the market this morning to buy, vegetables, but the problem is, half of them I have never even seen before! I tried to ask, but I was met with only gazes of…I do not know the word, ill intent? The stall holder removed my headscarf, and lâ afham why either. I only tried to do what was asked of me, nothing more.
It wasn’t all bad however. I met up with my fellow Muslimmah, Djaq. I knew her as Saffiya but that I guess, is irrelevant for the time being. The point is, Allah has smiled upon me and reunited me at least, with someone that can understand my tongue. I find it strange that she has been here for so long, yet I have not noticed. Have I really been in the shadows; or has she? I doubt very much that it really matters, the real thing to consider now, is how on earth we can get back to Mecca.
I do get the feeling that perhaps, she no longer wants to return home. She talked of her salvation in the form of a gang of men; and from her tone I can only assume she means the outlaws. But the twinkle in her eyes as she spoke, it tells me more than friendship is at stake. I don’t really understand why she, chooses to disregard the rules of modesty, but if she’s found someone that she loves, then perhaps it is not a bad sacrifice to have made.
I did not speak to her for long today, we both had more pressing situations to attend to, but those few moments were priceless, and I would not exchange them for all the promises of heaven in the world. I think she knows I don’t like being here. Not in the castle, perhaps not even this country. I just want to go home. Somewhere I can live and dress in peace without ignorance, abuse or intolerance.
I know I’m only a few inches away from being strung up by the neck for disobedience, but I really do not care anymore. I work for a living, yet I do not get paid. I suffer without understanding and without communication because that is easier than finding attachment to people and places, when I have every intention of leaving. I do not know how Djaq managed it this long, but she must have some good friends on her side to help her keep a clear head. I just wish that I’d been able to see more of her….
Ah. Someone is coming, and there are rumours of an influx of new prisoners. I suppose I had better go and check on them, and see to it that my work is done so I do not join them. Ma'a ssa'lâma
~ Imani
Lugha wâhida lâ takfî
Sorry. I suppose I should write this in English, seeing as how I’m meant to be, what’s the word? ‘Improving’ my skills in the Gaudi tongue. They think I can’t speak it, but that’s their own look out for failing to truly comprehend the signs. Today wasn’t necessarily the best day I could’ve had, but it wasn’t terrible either. I was sent to the market this morning to buy, vegetables, but the problem is, half of them I have never even seen before! I tried to ask, but I was met with only gazes of…I do not know the word, ill intent? The stall holder removed my headscarf, and lâ afham why either. I only tried to do what was asked of me, nothing more.
It wasn’t all bad however. I met up with my fellow Muslimmah, Djaq. I knew her as Saffiya but that I guess, is irrelevant for the time being. The point is, Allah has smiled upon me and reunited me at least, with someone that can understand my tongue. I find it strange that she has been here for so long, yet I have not noticed. Have I really been in the shadows; or has she? I doubt very much that it really matters, the real thing to consider now, is how on earth we can get back to Mecca.
I do get the feeling that perhaps, she no longer wants to return home. She talked of her salvation in the form of a gang of men; and from her tone I can only assume she means the outlaws. But the twinkle in her eyes as she spoke, it tells me more than friendship is at stake. I don’t really understand why she, chooses to disregard the rules of modesty, but if she’s found someone that she loves, then perhaps it is not a bad sacrifice to have made.
I did not speak to her for long today, we both had more pressing situations to attend to, but those few moments were priceless, and I would not exchange them for all the promises of heaven in the world. I think she knows I don’t like being here. Not in the castle, perhaps not even this country. I just want to go home. Somewhere I can live and dress in peace without ignorance, abuse or intolerance.
I know I’m only a few inches away from being strung up by the neck for disobedience, but I really do not care anymore. I work for a living, yet I do not get paid. I suffer without understanding and without communication because that is easier than finding attachment to people and places, when I have every intention of leaving. I do not know how Djaq managed it this long, but she must have some good friends on her side to help her keep a clear head. I just wish that I’d been able to see more of her….
Ah. Someone is coming, and there are rumours of an influx of new prisoners. I suppose I had better go and check on them, and see to it that my work is done so I do not join them. Ma'a ssa'lâma
~ Imani
Lugha wâhida lâ takfî